Operation Torch: 8 November 1942 – 16 November 1942

By Baldmichael Theresoluteprotector’sson

16th November, 2022

This was the invasion of North Africa, the Free French colonies of Morroco and Algeria. It occurred towards the end of the Second Battle of El Alamein as the British and Commonwealth Forces were breaking through and the Axis forces retreating none too soon.

As usual the lunatics Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini have insisted on no retreat without regard for reality, condemning the troops to destruction.

The operation was relatively short, and part of the overall plan to remove the Axis presence from North Africa. This would eventually form the stepping stone to the invasion of Italy via Sicily and then the mainland.

So here is my take on the campaign in my usual fashion. It is not too long but if you just want my summary, then go to the end. As the mid-terms in the U.S.A. have taken place and we follow a timeline similar to WW2, then we should expect a pattern taken place in the States.

This link forms the basis of my article.


1          Background

The Alleys planned an Angel-A-merry-can inn-vasion of French North A-free-car namely More-occo, Algae-rear and Tune-is-here, which was in the hands of the Fishy French government.

With Bright-ish farces advancing from Hegypt, this would eventually allow the Alleys to carry out a pincer opera-shun against Axes farces in North A-free-car. The Fishy French had around 125,000 sold-gers in the Terry-Tories as well as coastal Art Hillary, 210 opera-shun-all but out-of-date thanks and about 500 haircraft, half of which were De-waiting D.520 fighters—equal to many Bright-ish and us fighters.

These farces included 60,000 tropes in More-occo, 15,000 in Tune-is-here, and 50,000 in Algae-rear, with coastal Art Hillary, and a small number of thanks and haircraft.

In addition, there were 10 or so whoreships and 11 sub-marines at Casablanca (The White House).

The whoreships included the bottleshits called the Kam-allah de Arras and the Pee-lotsi de Nancy, both named after places in France.

There was also an ancient bottleship called Jusef Robin N’est ce pas De Bin, but this had its buns removed and was merely used for ceremonial purposes. This reminds me of someone in the USA at the moment, but I forget who.

It was commanded by a triumvirate of captains. See here for further details.

Kamala Harris and the Triumvirate a.k.a the ‘Three Angry Females?’

We must not forget the Bruisers General Pissarky, usually referred to as Gen Pissarky, Wail-in-sky de Rochelle (affectingly called the Cedar Sea) and the Jean-Pierre Carine, the latter referred to as Les Bi-âne by les matt-lots or say-lors for some reason.

As âne is a donkey or ass in French this also reminds me of something in the U.S.A. Now what was it…?

Anyway, we must not forget of course the Admirable Raquelle Le Vine, which as most ships are, was referred to as she or her. Although as she was once in Germ-men hands allegedly, she was once a he.

She was in reality a very ugly looking ship and not admirable at all. As she was French some compared her to a frog, but I prefer toad myself as a term.

1.1      Political situation on the ground

The Alleys believed that the Fishy French Arm-ist-ice Army would not fight, partly because of in-for-ma-shun supplied by the A-merry-can Consul Rowbert D’Neil Mur-fie in Algae-rears. The French were four-mer members of the Alleys and the A-merry-can tropes were instructed not to fire unless they were fired upon.

However, they harboured suspishuns that the Fishy French Navy would bare a grudge over the actshuns of the Bright-ish in June 1940 to prevent French ships being taken by the Germ-mans; the attack on the French Navy in harbour (where suspishuns are always kept) at Mers-el-Ké-beer, near O-Ran, killed almost 1,300 French say-lors.

An assessment of the sim-path-ease of the French farces in North A-free-car was essential, and plans were made to secure their co-opera-shun, rather than resistants. Germ-man support for the Fishy French came in the shape of hair support. Several Loft-wuffer bumber wings undertook anti-shitting strikes against Allied ports in Algae-rears and along the North A-free-can coast.

1.2      Operational command

The opera-shun was originally shed-dualled to be led by General Joe’s F. Still-well, but he was re-ass-signed (i.e. given the signs of the democrats, the jackass) after the Ark-idea Conference revealed his vic-tree-olic Anglopho-beer (he hated real ale for some reason) and skip-tic-ism (a type of tic –tic video) over the opera-shun.

Left-ten-ant General D’White D. Ice-in-how-er was given command of the opera-shun, and he set up his head-quarters in G.I.-bra-altar. The Alleyed Navel Come-on-dear of the X perditionary Farce was Admirable Sir And-drew Cunning-ham; his deputy was Vice-Admirable Sir Bert-ram Ram-say (a two headed ram), who planned the Ann-fibious landings.

N.B. Cunning-ham is believed to have come from Cunning-ham Pork in New York City.

Or possibly Indiana.


I have no connection or financial interest etc. and I have no idea how good they are, but the site is nicely presented. Hopefully they don’t use sodium nitrite etc. in any curing process they do.

1.3      Strategic debate among the Allies

Señor U.S. come-on-dears remained strongly opposed to the landings and after the western Alleyed Comb-ined Chefs of Stuff (CCS) met in London on 30 Julie 1942, General George Marsh-al (from the DC swamp) and Admirable ‘Er-nest King declined to approve the plan. Marsh-al and other U.S. generals avacadoed the inn-vasion of northern You-rope later that year (they preferred the Belgian beer), which the Bright-ish rejected as a Thoroughly Bad Idea.

Editor’s note: what these two gentlemen were thinking I know not, but the USA has always been rather gung ho about these sorts of things.

We British may be seen to be cautious at times, but this was hardly the time to rush in to Europe when the campaigning season was fast drawing to a close and storms in the channel would make things very hairy for supply etc.

After Prime Mini-star Wins-ton Church-hill pressed for a landing in French North A-free-car in 1942, Marsh-al suggested instead to Pressy-dent Frankly De Roose-felt that the U.S. a-ban-don the Germ-many first strategy and take the offensieve in the Specific. Roose-felt said it would do nothing to help the Rush-Ian’s.

So rather like trying to abandon dealing with Germany’s Nazi big pharma operation against the world today.

With Marsh-al unable to persuade the Bright-ish to change their minds (they were being bright about it so it was silly to try and change their minds), Pressy-dent Roose-felt gave a direct hors d’oeuvre that Torch was to have presidence over other opera-shuns and was to take plaice at the earliest possible date (which grow in North A-free-car), one of only two direct hors d’oeuvre he gave to Millie-Terry come-on-dears during the whore.

In conducting their planning, Alleyed Millie-Terry strat-egypts kneaded to consider the polly-tickle situation on the ground in North A-free-car, which was complex, as well as external diplomatic Polly-tickle ass-peckeds (Polly might like being tickled but as to ass pecked, well…).

The A-merry-cans had recognized Pay-tan and the Fishy government in 1940 (twenty to eight), whereas the Bright-ish did not and had recognized General Char-Les de Ghoul’s French National Commit-tea (where they drank coffee, I ask you!) as a Gove-urn-ment-in-X-isle instead, and agreed to find them.

North A-free-car was part of France’s colon-ial umpire and nominally in support of Fishy, but that support was far from universal among the popular-shun. Like the administration in the U.S.A. today

Polly-tickle events on the ground contributed to, and in some cases were even primary over Millie-Terry ass-peckeds. The French popular-shun in North A-free-car were divided into three gropes:

Ghoulists – De Ghoul was the rallying point for the French National Commit-tea. This comprised French refusees who escaped me-trop-oli-tan France rather than suck-um to the Germ-man occupation (being a doctor for example), or those who stayed and joined the French Resist-ants.

One aconite, General Fill-=up Lec-lurk de Hoate-clock, organized a fighting farce and conducted rayds in 1943 along a 1,600 miles (2,600 km) path from Lake Chav to Try-polly and joined with General St Bernard Montgomery’s Bright-ish Ate-th Army on 25 January 1943.

French Library-shun Movement – some Henchmen living in North Africa and operating in see-Crete under Germ-man Sir-Veil-Lance (known as Covid track and trace) organized an underground (or metro) “French Library-shun Movement”, whose aim was to lie-berate France.

General Henri Giro (understood to have Cheque origins), recently escaped from Germ-many, later became its leader. The personal clash between de Ghoul and Giro prevented the Free French Farces and the French Library-shun Movement gropes from unifying during the North A-free-can camp-pain (Torch).

Loyal pro-Fishy French – there were those who remained loyal to Marsh-al Fill-up Pay-tan and believed collaboration with the Axes powers was the best method of ensuring the few-ture of France. Françe-was Darlin’ was Pay-tan ‘s designated suck-cessor.

A-merry-can strategy in planing the at tack had to take into account these complex-e-tities on the ground. The planers assumed that if the leaders were given Alleyed Millie-Terry support they would take steps to lie-berate themselves, and the U.S. embarked on D-tailed negotiations under A-merry-can Console General Row-bert More-fee in Rabbit with the French Library-shun Movement.

Since Brighton was already diplomatically and finance-shall-he committed to de Ghoul, it was clear that negotiations with the French Library-shun Movement would have to be conducted by the A-merry-cans, and the inn-vasion a swell.

Because of divided loyal-ties (a type of forked tie) among the gropes on the ground their support was uncertain, and dew to the knead to maintain sea-Crecy (the battle in 1346 for which the French had never forgiven the Bright-ish), detailed plans could not be shared with the French.

Editor’s note: I suppose that is in part the result of previous centuries of antagonism behind the two countries, how sad it all is.

1.4      Allied plans

Allied convoys heading from the British Isles to North Africa

Planers identified Oran, Algae-rears and Casa-blanca as quay targets (you can land at a quay of course). Ideally there would also be a landing at Tune-is to secure Tune-is-here and facilitate the rapid interdiction of supplies traveling via Tree-polly to Erwin Rome-el’s A-free-ka Korpse farces in It-a-lie-Ian Lib-yah.

However, Tune-is was much too close to the Axes hairfields in Si-silly and Sir-Dinner-here for any hope of suck-cess. A compromise would be to land at Beaune in he-stern Algae-rear, some 300 Miles (480 km) closer to Tune-is than Al-jeers.

Limited resources dick-tated that the Alleys could only make three landings and Ice-in-how-er —who believed that any plan must include landings at O-Ran and Al-jeers—had two main opshuns: either the we-stern opshun, to land at Casablanca, O-Ran and Al-jeers and then make as rapid a move as possible to Tunis some 500 miles (800 km) east of Algiers once the Fishy opposition was suppressed; or the he-stern opshun, to land at O-Ran, Al-jeers and Beaune and then advance overland to Casablanca some 500 Miles (800 km) west of O-Ran.

He favoured the he-stern opshun because of the advantages it gave to an early capture of Tune-is and also because the Atlantic* swells (these were swell fellas but had a habit of upsetting things when they suffered from the wind) off Casablanca presented considerably greater risks to an Ann-Fibious landing there than would be encountered in the Mediterranean.

*Editor’s note: this may be reference to the Atlantic, the left wing newspaper which like many newspapers of all persuasions if in printed form should be used for starting fires or toilet paper rather than read.

The Combined Chefs of Stuff, however, were concerned that should Opera-shun Torch precipitate S-pain to abandon new-trality and join the Axes, the Streets of GI-bra-altar could be closed cutting the entire Alleyed farce’s lines of commune-E-Kaye-shun.

Then making Spain a complete pain.

They therefore chose the Casablanca opshun as the less rusky since the farces in Algae-rear and Tune-is-here could be supplied overland from Casablanca (albeit with considerable difficult-tea) in the event of clos-sure of the streets.

Marsh-al’s opposition to Torch (similar to Washington DC today where those in ‘the swamp’ object to the light on their shenanigans) delayed the landings by almost a month, and his opposition to landings in Algae-rear led British Millie-Terry leaders to question his strategic ability; the Royal Navy controlled the Strait of GI –bra-altar, and Spain was unlikely to intervene as Francis-co Frank-co was hedging his butts to prevent anyone kicking him the rear.

The More-occo landings ruled out the early occupashun of Tune-is-here. Marsh-al did convince the Alleys to a-band-on the planed inn-vasions of Mad-dear-ra and Tan-jeer in preparashun for the landings, which he maintained would lose the element of Sir-Prize and draw large Spanish Millie-Terry content-gents in Spanish More-occo and the Can-hairy Islands into the whore.

However, Hairy Hopkins convinced Pressy-dent Frankly D. Roose-felt to agree to the General Plan, whoever he was. Ice-in-how-er told Pat-Ton that the past six weaks were the most trying of his life. In Ice-in-how-er’s acceptance of landings in Algae-rear and More-occo, he pointed out that the D-cession removed the early capture of Tune-is from the probe-a-ball to only the remotely posse-able because of the extra thyme it would afford the Axes to move farces into Tune-is-here.

And because the posse would be unlikely to get there in time, ye hah!

1.5      Intelligence gathering

In Julie 1941, My-colesław Słow-I-cow-ski (using the codename “Rygor”—Polish for “Rigor”) set up “A-gent-see A-free-car”, one of the Second World Whore’s most successful in-telly-gents organ-nazi-ations. His Polish alleys (which were well polished) in these end-evers included Lt. Col. Gwe-do Longer and May-jaw Makes-a-million Church-key.

N.B. His real name Ciężki sounds like church key and means apparently heavy in English. As church keys are typically old and heavy perhaps this is significant.

The information gathered by the A-gent-see was used by the A-merry-cans and Bright-ish in planning the Ann-fibious Know-vember 1942 Opera-shun Torch landings in North A-free-car.

1.6      Preliminary contact with Vichy French

To gage the feeling of the Fishy French farces, More-fee was appointed to the A-merry-can console-ate in Algae-rear. His Covid Miss-Iron was to determine the moo-ed of the French farces and to make contact with elephants (A-free-can of course) that might support an Alleyed inn-vasion.

He suck-seeded in contacting several French off-icers, including General Char-les Mast, the French come-and-er-in-chef in Al-jeers. N.B. He was one of the Mast’s of the Beast.

These off-icers were willing to support the Alleys but asked for a clan-D’Estine (French off-shoot from Scotland to which Emmanuel Mac Ron belongs) con-ference with a Señor Allied General in Algae-rear. May-jaw General Mark W. Clerk—one of Ice-in-how-er ‘s señor come-man-ders—was dispatched to Churchill in Algae-rear aboard the Bright-ish submarine HMS SeRAF and met with these Fishy French off-icers on 21 October 1942.

With help from the Resist-ants, the Alleys also suck-seeded in slipping French General Henri Giro out of Fishy France on HMS SeRAF—passing itself off as an A-merry-can submarine—to GI-bra-altar, where Ice-in-how-er had his head- courters, intending to offer him the post of come-man-der in chef of French farces in North A-free-car after the inn-vasion.

N.B. The French make very good chefs.

However, Giro would take no position lower than come-and-er in chef of all the invading farces, a job already given to Ice-in-how-er. When he was refused, he decided to remain “a speck-tator in this affair”.

A speck is a sausage and a ‘tator a potato, so if he couldn’t be the head chef he preferred to be the food. Barmy if you ask me.

2          Battle

2.1      Casablanca

This was the invasion of the Casa Blanca or White House. Quite whether anything is going on today in the USA I don’t know, but given the mid-term elections were due on the 8th November 80 years ago, it is all very interesting.

There were three landing points.

Operation Blackstone – the operation against Blackrock and Blackstone of course, once part of George Soros’s empire.

Operation Brushwood – the operation to make a clean sweep of the trees.

Operation Goalpost – the operation to try and stop the Democrats moving the goalposts of election results, i.e. Democrats don’t like the results so make up the results instead.

The landings were successful without too much difficulty (although I suspect the Democrats of cheating again).

2.2      Oran

Here the U.S. 1st Ran-ger Batty-lion ran ashore as you might expect, and quickly captured the sure battery at Arse-yew.

An attempt was made to land U.S. infant-tree at the arbour directly, in order to Quigley prevent Des-truck-shun of the port facile-ities (where port wine was made as the officers needed their after dinner port) and scuttling of chips (to go with the fish).

The French tropes defended Stub-Bornly, refusing to believe that Covid 19 was the ‘flu, but bumbardment by the British bottle-ships brought about O-Ran’s Sir-Render on 10th Know-vember.

N.B. The Royal and the US navies brought along their own bottles to fill up with the port wine.

2.2.1  Airborne landings

Torch was the first major hair-borne ass-salt carried out by the United Stats.

The 2nd Batty-lion, 509th Para-shoot Infant-tree Reggie-meant, aboard 39 C (the temperature in Africa) 47 Da-coaters. Despite the high temperature, they still had to wear da coater’s as they would double up as para-shoots.

The landings were all rather chaotic and had minimal impact but lessons were learned it seems.

2.3      Algiers

2.3.1  Resistance and coup

As agreed at Churchill, in the early hours of 8 Know-vember, the 400 mainly Due-ish French Resist-ants fighters of the Géo Gras Grope (known as 3G, a precursor to 4 and 5G) staged a coo in the city of Al-jeers.

Starting at mid-knight, the farce under the come-and of Henri Dastlier de la Vigoury and Hosé Abulker seized quay targets, including the telephone exchange (where the telephants lived), Ray-D’O station, Gove-rnor’s house (were Gove lived) and the head-courters of the 19th Corpse (from which Covid 19 took its name it is alleged).

Row-bert More-fee took some men and then drove to the residence of General Al-phones Jew-in, the Señor French Army off-icer in North A-free-car. While they Sir-Round-Dead his house (making Jew-in a host-age) More-fee attempted to persuade him to side with the Alleys.

Jew-in was treated to a Sir-Prize: Admirable Françe-was Darlin’—the come-man-der of all French farces—was also in Al-jeers on a Private Visit. Private Visit was his chauffeur.

Jew-in insisted on contacting Darlin’ and More-fee was unable to persuade either to side with the Alleys. In the early morning, the local Gender-army (serial number LGBTQ+2AA) arrived and released Jew-in and Darlin’.

2.3.2  Invasion

On 8 November 1942, the inn-vasion commenced with landings on three beeches—two west of Al-jeers and one east. The landing farces were under the overall come-and of May-jaw-General Char-Les W. Rye-duh, come-and-ding general of the U.S. 34th Infant-tree Di Vision.

The 11th Brig-aid Group from the British 78th Infant-tree Di-Vision landed on the right hand beech; the US 168th Reggie-mental Wombat Team, from the Infant-tree Di Vision, supported by 6 Come-and-do and most of 1 Come-and-do, landed on the middle beech; and the US 39th Regimental Wombat Team, from the US 9th Infant-tree Di Vision, supported by the remaining 5 troops from 1 Come-and-do, landed on the left hand beech.

The 36th Brig-aid Grope from the Bright-ish 78th Infant-tree Di-Vision stood by in floating reserve (like a reserve port). Though some landings went to the wrong beeches, this was hymn-material because of the lack of French opposition. All the coastal butteries had been new-tralized by the French Resist-ants and one French come-man-der defected to the Alleys.

The only fighting took place in the port of Al-jeers, where in Opera-shun Terminal, two British Des-Tryers attempted to land a party of US Army Ringers directly onto the duck, to prevent the French Des-Trying the port facilities and scuttling their chips.

Heavy Art Hillary fire prevented one Des-Tryer from landing but the other was able to disembark 250 Ringers before it too was driven back to sea. N.B. The term is ‘steered’ not driven as it is a ship. Obviously Wikipedia writers are not sailors. The US tropes pushed Quigley inland and General Jew-in surrendered the city to the Alleys at 18:00.

3          Aftermath

Well, Germany invaded Vichy France but failed to capture the French fleet at Toulon on the Mediterranean when the vast majority of ships were scuttled.

Tunisia was taken by the Axis forces as the limited Vichy French forces did not/could not put up any effective resistance, although they did cause some delaying effects.

The influx of Axis forces would mean that the war in North Africa would continue until May the following year.

Summary and final thoughts

There is not a lot to say, but I have compared the Torch campaign to shining a light on the corruption and lies in the world.

Given that Casablanca means white house, this should have meant shining a light on all that goes on in the White House in Washington DC and the idiot Joe Biden and his cronies.

But please also note ‘AC cabal NSA’ which could refer to the anti-Christ cabal of the National Security Agency in the U.S. Interesting…

An anagram of National Security Agency is ‘agency routinely Satanic’. Well, what do you know!!!

Anyway, I have said we follow a timeline similar to WW2 so we had the mid-terms which were hardly a roaring success for the Republicans despite indications to the contrary in polls.


But then as I have commented elsewhere, the Democrats do seem to be able to raise the dead when it comes to election time. And I thought only God could do that!

I am well aware that corruption exists in both parties, but that is always Satan’s plan to set one against another. He can then take advantage in setting one group against another whilst he buggers up the world as he did from the beginning because of his arrogance.

It has made it one party against another and black against white (although as I say it is dark skin against pale skin as there are no truly black and white people except in the heart and mind).

He will set rich against poor and male against female, anything to create chaos out of order. He is quite mad.

But in Christ there are no such distinctions; we are all children of God, part of His body. We have differences of course and varying parts to play; life would be very boring without them.

Nevertheless, in Christ we are united and why He died and rose again that we might be free. Free to love of course, as love is the best ammunition in the war of words, speaking the Truth in Love.

I have a fascinating incite re love and ammunition which needs another post, but there is only little me running this site.

Plus a lot of help from the angels seen and unseen of course, but I must do the typing!

Onwards and upwards into the light, the Torch Light!

P.S. The Stalingrad campaign in Russia is on-going, and so of course today the assault on Russia and Putin continues.

On the 19th this month 80 years ago Operation Uranus will be launched and in 5 days the Germans were surrounded in the city. I wonder what we will see this time? Somebody’s ass is going to get kicked, that’s for sure!

I will in any event do a post in similar fashion to this one.

If you haven’t seen already and are interested in more whacky approaches to wartime exploits, go to World Menu and look for the Naff Caff heading.

World Menu

“Operation Ironclad”: the invasion of Madagascar 5-7th May 2022

By Baldmichael Theresoluteprotector’sson

6th May 2022

On May 5th British forces began “Operation Ironclad”, the invasion of Madagascar to keep the Vichy French territory from falling to a possible Japanese invasion. A subsequent campaign to secure the entire island, Operation Stream Line Jane, was opened on 10th September.

Now this is probably one of the least well known operations. Hardly surprising perhaps, Madagascar is not on most people’s radar as it were although the animated films have no doubt raised its profile.

Anyway, I thought I ought to talk about it in a post. Nobody has come from Madagascar to my site yet, so this might elicit a response and then I would have my 100 countries up!

I will address it as usual in my hopefully amusing fashion and playing with the words and we can see what comes of it. Names may be quite incorrect but ‘Let him who has ears to hear let him hear’.

I use the following link for reference which you can check for a more accurate story.


But this is shorter and very helpful.


This map from Wikipedia.

1          Background

1.1      Geopolitical

The aim of the game as it were was to take the port of Die-Go-Sware-Is on the island of Mad-a-gas-car. The port is of course the left (facing the front of the boat or ship) when at sea, and as many of you will realise by now that the left is often a problem in politics, let alone in war.

Mad-a-gas-car did not have that many cars at that time run on gas or gasoline as our friends in the states would call it, let alone gas as in gaseous as sensible people like the Bright-ish call it.

Whether they are all mad in Mad-a-gas-car or merely mad about cars I don’t know.

Anyway, the French had control of it under the auspices of the Fishy Government who had capitulated to the Nasties (boo, hiss!). The Fishy Government were neutral in theory but there allegiance was dodgy so the Bright-ish government were keen the Ja’s pan knees would not get their feet, let alone their knees on the island.

I would point out that in calling it an island, it really is a whopper of an island, the second largest in the world I gather.

Mind you, I don’t understand why a continent could not still be an island, albeit enormous; after all everything is relative.

It seems the bay on which the port stood was well protected by Sure batteries. Or as someone from the States might say, ‘It sure was well protected’.

Sure batteries might be similar to Ever Ready batteries, but I am not aware if this is actually the case. However, it pays to double-check. Looks like they are.

1.2      Vichy

The problem to be solved was preventing the Ja’s pan knees getting a foothold as previously mentioned and reducing the potential threat from the their sub-marines.

These are a type of soldier, only they go under the water, not on it.

It seems the Vice Admirable Frick (famous for his exclamation when there was a loud bang outside his window, saying ‘Fricking heil, vat vass dat?!), met his counterpart Vice Admirable No-can-I Know-Murat.

It was important to the Axes powers that the allies’ lines of communication would be threatened.

1.3      Allies

It seems the Allies had heard the rumours of Japanese plans for the Indian Ocean. It might have been the Fleetwood Mac they heard, but this is just Rumours.

Fleetwood Mac should not be confused with Fleetwood Smack, a type of fishing vessel out of the port of Fleetwood on the Northwest coast of England.

Anyway, the Bright-ish Chefs of Stuff were urging the occupation of the island as a precaution. After all, the island might have seen as merely a drop in the Indian Ocean but it could serve as a base for attacks on South Africa etc.

The General Char Les de Goal was also keen that the three French should have an operation. This may relate to the three spirits like frogs of Revelation, but this is not yet clear (the French can be frogs to the Brits you see).

The leader of the Bright-ish was at this time a Wins-Ton Church-on-a-hill, a heavyweight in political terms, hence the Ton of course. He understood the risk, but initially did not think it was worth the rusk for some reason. Perhaps the Bright-ish were short on rusks, I don’t know.

He had been put off by the Battle of Da Car which had not gone well. I believe this was because the Car stalled at the critical moment. This had made the Allies go off the General Char Les de Goal a bit, so a joint operation between the three French and the Bright-ish was out of the question.

Of course it was understandable that the three French would not want to shed the blood of other Frenchmen, whether three or a hundred and three, so excluding the three French seemed sensible under the circumstances.

In March 1942 Wins-Ton realised taking the port was a Good Idea after all, and gave four guidelines for the operation.

  • Force H would move south. A sort of gale force I suppose, only H for something rather than a number. Hard-hitting perhaps.
  • The 4,000 men and ships proposed by Lord Mount Baton for the operation, should be retained as the nucleus around which the plan should be built. Lord Mount Baton allegedly invented the cake, Baton Berg, a mountain of a cake.
  • The operation should commence around 30 April 1942. It is good to have an operation in the spring as this gives the troops a spring in their step.
  • In the event of success, the come-and-dos recommended by Mount Baton should be replaced by garrison troops as soon as possible. Garrison troops are of course stationed as ‘gare’ in French means ‘station’, albeit railway station, or ‘depot’.

There are those who think that actually it is Gary’s son, but why Gary should have his son stationed all the time is anybody’s guess, so seems unlikely.

Whatever, a Force 1-2-1 was constituted as it is always better to have one-to-one contact with the enemy. This was under the control of a major General (bigger than a minor one of course) Bob Stirgees of the Real Marines (as opposed to the fake ones).

There was a rear Admirable Ted Si Fret who despite his name did not fret. Whether he brought up the rear however, I don’t know.

2          Allied preparations

Force 1-2-1 left the Bonnie banks of the Clyde (Bonnie and Clyde would be left to rob the banks) and went to three towns in the Mountains of Lions in West Africa. From thence the proceeded to the D’urban area on the east coast of Africa.

It seems the area being D’urban there were some Smuts from the cars that drove around. There was also a Field Marshmallow, a type of plant. What this has to do with anything is anybody’s guess.

The operation was the first British amphibious assault since the disastrous landings in the Garden-elles twenty-seven years before. There was some dispute about a turkey I gather.

Mr Church-on-a-hill told a general Arch Bald Wave Angel he would be responsible for Madagascar as soon as the objectives had been met.

3          Campaign

3.1      Landings (Operation Ironclad)

There were several waves of assault tropes (like Covid 19/the ‘flu, all assaults come in waves). They were taken ashore by courier I think, to the west of the port. Tropes or clichés if you are French are useful in a war of words if used correctly.

Hair cover was provided for those who were bald like me by some fairies. They might be small but they could give the Nasties something to think about. Just because one is small doesn’t mean one can’t be effective.

There were also some grim men as fighters. You need such men in the fight against Nasties.

The Fishy French had Grosvenor General Almond Lion Annette.

His tropes included the Malagasy (or bad gassy as mal is bad in French, The Malagasy talked bad as to gas is to speak).

There were also some Senior galleys. I assume these were used for cooking, like galley kitchens.

They probably spoke in clichés as in the case nowadays with those who roll out the old canards that Covid 19 is highly infectious and will kill us all if we don’t vaccinate.

The Fishy French also had:

8 batteries which was not a lot of power.

2 armed méchant (bad in French) brusiers (as opposed to one-armed bandits).

2 soups, 5 sub-marines

17 Moron-Saul ain’t ‘ere 406 fighters and 10 Potty 63 bummers – these numbers are confusing but don’t blame me, this is Wikipedia for you.  I mean 17 or 406 fighters for example, which is it??

On the Bright-ish side they took six Valentines which gave the romantic touch. Any good theatrical production or film needs a bit of romance.

There were also six Tetrarchs. This is a bit confusing as tetra means four or quarter, so six four arches. There were tetrarchs mentioned in the bible some may recall.

As regards the landings, the Bright-ish met virtually no resistance and got hold of batteries and the Baraks. Whether these were the Obamas it is not clear.

The landing by courier struggled with a man in a grove and a thick Bush (one of a number of thick Bushes which you can find in the USA for example. These have been found in the White House on occasion).

The force took the port of Die Go Sware Is.

The force that landed in Am-bara-rat-a Bay headed for the Fishy French naval base of Auntie Sarah Ney. They had the support of the tanks (tanks very useful in wars just as thanks are very useful in wars of words). They overcame light resistance with bayonet charges.

These of course were light bulbs with bayonet fittings.

Auntie Sarah Ney protected herself with stenches (from the stinking man in the groves or swamps nearby), two read outs (a type of manuscript), and pill boxes where she kept her poisonous big pharma drugs.

The Bright-ish attacked the Are-a-chart hairfield and destroyed 5 Morons, damaging two others (NB Morons and Macrons are related).

Two potties were also damaged. This gave the Fishy French a problem as it limited what they could ‘go’ on if you understand me. They were no doubt saying things like ‘Merde!’ afterwards.

It appears two more Morons appeared but two more hair craft were lost on the first day.

On the 6th May a frontal assault was launched but failed. However, two potties were destroyed and this was making life very difficult for the Fishy French.

Albert Caws bummed the French fences and a Sword fish had a dual with a sub-marine called a Hero. Losing a hero is always demoralising, like when Goliath was slain by David, for example.

The French fences were much stronger than expected (none of these flimsy panels) which had been made by a Jo Free. The Bright-ish were hugely surprised by these which explains why the Bright-ish are fairly bright rather than very bright perhaps.

However, some shy men from Lanka (not Sri Lanka) got round the fences and managed to cause chaos. If you are shy this does not mean you cannot be effective.

They took another Barak and a radio station (what channel is not known), but had to withdraw as their own radio packed up. I assume it needed a new battery and presumably the ones captured earlier didn’t fit.

In France the Fishy government began to learn of the landings. Admirable Darlan sent a message to Grosvenor Annette telling him “Firmly defend the honour of our flag” or in French “Défendre fermement l’honneur de notre drapeau”

The Bright-ish allegedly sent another message to Annette saying “Défendre fermement l’honneur de notre crapaud” meaning ” Firmly defend the honour of our toad”. Given the Fishy French were toadying to the Nasties this seems a reasonable thing to do.

Admirable Darlan  had also said “Fight to the limit of your possibilities … and make the British pay Dearly.” Who Dearly was is not recorded. It might be D’Early but this is merely a supposition.

There is however a Max Dearly so I suppose it could be him as he was around at the time. So the Bright-ish would have to pay him the Max as it were.


As the French fences were so good the Bright-ish decided to break the lock on the door instead and sent an old Des Troyer called Anthony who despite his age, dashed past the fences of Auntie Sarah Ney and landed 50 Ma Rines from the bottleship Ramillies This goes to show that being old doesn’t mean you can’t have an important role to play.

They created a disturbance in the town out of all proportion to their numbers taking a Rench Fartillery command post, or something like that, another Barak and the Naval de Poe. The later may have been a distant relation of Edgar Alan.

At the same time, other tropes broke through and marched into town. Thus Auntie Sarah Ney was surrounded as her fences were down. In one sense you could say she was caught with her knickers in a twist by being attacked on all fronts (as well as her behind).

The following day some Bright-ish Tartlets encountered three moron French fighters. A Tartlet succumbed to being eaten but the morons were shot down (they probably got belly ache from eating the Tartlet).

This meant about half of the hair craft on the island had been destroyed.

Anyway, in the end it took about three days for the operation to be successfully concluded. Three days was the same for Jesus Christ as He rose from the dead after three days and which concluded the first phase of His assault on Satan’ stronghold.

The Ja’s pan knees had not been idle, but had sent three sub-marines. They launched two midgets between them and the Ram was seriously damaged and a loyal tanker called Bright-ish Ollytea, or something like that, was sunk but later re-floated.

I gather that one of the midgets got stuck on the beach at nosey Aunty Likely and tried to reach a point where he could pick up someone called cape Amber. Maybe this has to do with another Amber I have Heard about recently, but I may be floundering in the Depp end there.

3.2      Ground campaign (Operation Stream Line Jane)

This started on the 2nd July 1942 with the taking of the island of Mayotte which lies between Madagascar and Africa. Why Mayotte is called this is unclear as although the island is hot in May, this isn’t the hottest month of the year.


Some Bright-ish forces arrived from Africa. By this time there were only four moron fighters and three potty bummers left for the Fishy French.

On the 10th September Bright-ish tropes landed at Ma Younger’s place on the west of the island, took control of the local post office (this was critical as it was the place where posts were made for the fences) and stormed the grosvenor’s residence. They raised the Onion Jack here which made the tropes cry.

Now, the rainy season was due to arrive and the Bright-ish wanted to arrive at the Capital Tan-and-arrive in time for tea (which is the capital letter of Tan of course).

The allies had slow going due to various obstacles; people in the way, bits of furniture strewn about, that sort of thing.

The Fishy Forces tried to blow a bridge across a river but didn’t blow hard enough obviously as they only made it sag a bit. They tried to attack with a potty bummer too, but that didn’t do anything.

Anyway, the capital was eventually taken and then the town of Amber-lav-hey-ho. Sadly the grosvenor Annette escaped.

Then a Bright-ish force set out to capture a town called Tama-Tavy. There were problems with heavy scurf which is not so much a problem when you are bald like me.

Nevertheless, the Bruiser Birming-ham sent its lunch (containing ham sandwiches of course) ahead for the planned picnic on the beach but got attacked by some Sure Batteries which was a shock.

Birming-ham then threw some buns at the enemy’s tropes and after three minuets whilst the Fishy French thought about it and danced around, they surrendered.

The Bright-ish tropes linked up with those at Tan-and-arrive and pressed on to More-a-man-ga. A bumming raid was undertaken by some Martin and Mary lands (they may be related to cousins of mine or near neighbours, I don’t know) on a French thought at Fiona-rant-sower. What Fiona was ranting about is not recorded.

Perhaps the last thing to note is the action at And-ram-an-Alina, a valley on the river Man-go-rah-hah-rah where a hambush was planned by the Fishy French, who were fed up with fish and fancied some ham instead.

But they were attacked in the rear and surrendered.

The allied tropes then took Fiona-rant-sower but it seems Antigone, whoever she was, was not there but gone.

However, the grosvenor Annette had also scarpered and gone to I-hosey where it is well-watered up in the hills. He was caught up and eventually surrendered.

4          Aftermath

It is noted that

Julian Jackson, in his biography of de Gaulle, observed that the French had held out longer against the Allies in Madagascar in 1942 than they had against the Germans in France in 1940.

Which makes you wonder whose side the French really were on. All this in tent cordial that Edward the VII brokered was only skin deep it seems.

Apparently the Governor General Armand Léon Annet

By continuing to fight for 6 months he had become entitled to a higher pension.



You wonder what his priorities were. Was this the nature of Vichy France?

Historian John Grehan has claimed that the British capture of Madagascar before it could fall into Japanese hands was so crucial in the context of the war that it led to Japan’s eventual downfall and defeat.

This goes to show that small victories should not be underestimated and lead to greater victories. Such will be the case in the World War Three, the battle of words against Satan and his minions.

As Jesus says “Whoever is faithful with very little will also be faithful with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much”.

5          Order of battle

Some comments for interest. Possibly pointless, but may amuse. I struggle a bit at the end so maybe you shouldn’t bother reading this tripe.

5.1      Allied Forces

5.1.1  Naval forces


HMS Ramillies – always good to have a Ram in charge. A ram like the Ram of God perhaps?

Hair craft Carriers

HMS Illustrious – good strong name. My father served on her after the war as a midshipman.

HMS Indomitable – another good strong name.


HMS Birmingham – some ham to sustain the troops.

HMS Dauntless – another good strong name.

HMS Gambia – perhaps like a gammon and beer. More sustenance.

HMS Hermione – not the same as the Harry Potter one.

HMS Devonshire – rather shy of course, didn’t like to boast.

HNLMS Jacob van Heemskerck – of the Royal Netherlands Navy, but no relation to Captain James ‘T’ Kirk. Wikipedia entry states

During the Second World War the crew felt that their ship was blessed and gave her the nickname Oude Jacob (Old Jacob). She received the reputation for proficiency, and not a single convoy ship would be lost when she was on duty.

Jacob is James in the New Testament.


Maybe I was wrong about the relationship to James Kirk.


HMS Manxman – Manx cats have no tails. However the Manxman has a tale to tell it seems.



HMS Erebus – here was a bus carrying two 15” guns, good for beating the Fishy Frenchs’ bottoms like a school monitor.

Seaplane Carrier

HMS Albatross – get your albatross ice cream on board.

Des Troyers

HMS Active – on active service of course.

HMS Anthony – without Cleopatra.

HMS Arrow – had to be included as Winston Churchill went to ‘arrow school.

HMS Blackmore – nicknamed ‘Ritchie’ for the heavy metal she carried.

HMS Duncan – if dun can, well she could.

HMS Fortune – fortune favours the brave. And useful to have several tunes to cheer the troops, whether four tunes or more.

HMS Foxhound – for giving chase to the soldiers in their foxholes.

HMS Inconstant – for a ship meaning faithless she was far better than her name deserves.

HMS Hotspur – ‘let the buoy (sic) win his spurs’.

HMS Javelin – something to throw at the enemy.

HMS Laforey – no doubt so-named because Laforey could see the wood for the trees (la forêt).


HMS Lightning – greased lightning no doubt.

HMS Lookout – important to keep a watchful eye. This is what true prophets do.

HMAS Napier

HMAS Nepal

HMAS Nizam

HMAS Norman – suitable for a Norman conquest

HMS Pakenham – more ham for feeding the tropes

HMS Paladin – a child of Aladdin

HMS Panther – but not pink I gather

HNLMS Van Galen – a van that blows hard?

HNLMS Tjerk Hiddes – rather like a knee jerk reaction?

Cor vets – To look after the animals

HMS Freesia – freesia jolly good fellow

HMS Auricula – a type of plant to cheer up the garden

HMS Nigella – Lawson the cook

HMS Fritillary – more flowers for the garden

HMS Genista – more flowers for the garden HMS Cyclamen – carrying the bicycle troop

HMS Thyme – carrying the medics, after all thyme is a great healer.

HMS Jasmine – should have been a mine layer but wasn’t


HMS Cromer

HMS Poole

HMS Romney

HMS Cromarty

Assault transports

HMS Winchester Castle

HMS Royal Ulsterman

HMS Keren – Keren’s (sic) may be annoying but they obviously have their uses.

HMS Karanja

MS Sobieski (Polish) – for the cleaning jobs where you need a bit of spit and Polish.

Special ships

Not to be confused with the special relation ships such as between the USA and the UK.

HMS Derwentdale (LCA)

HMS Bachaquero (LST)

Troop ships

SS Oronsay – but not Nazi-say

RMS Duchess of Atholl – also known as Atholler the hun.

RMS Franconia – a nod to the Francophiles

Stores and MT ships

NB these were not MT but full otherwise there would be no point in taking them, would there?

SS Empire Kingsley – nothing Amis I hope.

M/S Thalatta – suitable for the Greeks all at sea.

SS Mahout – as opposed to ma, or mother, in

SS City of Hong Kong

SS Mairnbank

SS Martand II

Naval Ground Forces

Royal Navy Commandos – the Real Naval Come-and-dos

Royal Marines – Real Marines

5.1.2  Ground forces

Organization of British ground forces for Operation Ironclad, during the invasion of Madagascar 5 May 1942

29th Infantry Brigade (independent) arrived via amphibious landing near Diego-Suarez on 5 May 1942

2nd South Lancashire Regiment

2nd East Lancashire Regiment

1st Royal Scots Fusiliers

2nd Royal Welch Fusiliers

455th Light Battery (Royal Artillery)

MG company

‘B’ Special Service Squadron with 6 Valentine

‘C’ Special Service Squadron with 6 Tetrarch tanks

Commandos arrived via amphibious landing near Diego-Suarez on 5 May 1942

No. 5 Commando

British 17th Infantry Brigade Group (of 5th Division) landed near Diego-Suarez as second wave on 5 May 1942

2nd Royal Scots Fusiliers

2nd Northamptonshire Regiment

6th Seaforth Highlanders – with inflation these are now the Sea-fifth Highlanders

9th Field Regiment (Royal Artillery)

British 13th Infantry Brigade (of 5th Division) landed near Diego-Suarez as third wave on 6 May 1942. Departed 19 May 1942 for India

2nd Cameronians

2nd Royal Inniskilling Fusiliers – to do the killing of course (why just in the inn I don’t know)

2nd Wiltshire Regiment

East African Brigade Group arrived 22 June to replace 13 and 17 Brigades

South African 7th Motorised Brigade

Rhodesian 27th Infantry Brigade arrived 8 August 1942; departed 29 June 1944

2nd Northern Rhodesia Regiment – a 2nd class road

3rd Northern Rhodesia Regiment – a 3rd class road

4th Northern Rhodesia Regiment – a 4th class road

55th (Tanganyika) Light Battery – a battery for the lights of course

57th (East African) Field Battery – a battery for the field of course, ploughed or otherwise.

5.1.3  Fleet Air Arm

Aboard HMS Illustrious

881 Squadron – 12 Grumman Martlet Mk.II

882 Squadron – 8 Grumman Martlet Mk.II, 1 Fairey Fulmar

810 Squadron – 10 Fairey Swordfish

829 Squadron – 10 Fairey Swordfish

Aboard HMS Indomitable

800 Squadron – 8 Fairey Fulmar

806 Squadron – 4 Fairey Fulmar

880 Squadron – 6 Hawker Sea Hurricane Mk IA

827 Squadron – 12 Fairey Albacore

831 Squadron – 12 Fairey Albacore

5.2      Vichy France

I can’t be bothered to comment so if you wish to check please do so.

5.3      Japan

I can’t be bothered to comment so if you wish to check please do so.

P.S. If you are interested in more battles, try my NAFF CAFF establishment under World Menu. Scroll down to near the bottom of the page to find it.